Passion, to me.

pas·sion·ate
–adjective
1. having, compelled by, or ruled by intense emotion or strong feeling; fervid
(Taken from Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.)

To me, it is an overwhelming desire that converts a 'want' into a 'need'. An unconditional love for a act or a person. It can be embedded into your character or it can be aroused only in some contexts. But it survives in everyone of us. It breathes, laying dormant within us awaiting an opportunity to rise. And when risen, you see the likes of Mahatma Ghandi and Mother Theresa. When the passion is aroused, nothing else matters but that 'need' which was not too long ago, only a mere 'want'.

But sometimes amidst the light of passion, a certain darkness falls. In this darkness, doubts swirl; Is it worth it? The sacrifices and the loss? Is it necessary to feel so much for something? Would anyone care? How long will this last? Can so much passion 'kill'?

Doubts so powerful, they can weigh you down; burying you, pinning you down. And you lay there with no desire to fight against the odds. You see only the darkness occupy the space that light once stood so proudly.

And one can never escape this fate unless one chooses to. The choice to want to feel the need. The choice to want to feel the light. The belief in the faith in oneself.

Passion is after all a belief. A belief strong enough to convert a 'want' into a 'need'.

Please donate!

Pls donate to give this poor soul a home. Preferably my home.


or even for her cousin;



Or maybe even if it's for me to get a lic to keep them...

any kind of monetary donation is definitely appreciated!

Thanks..

I love that Carrera

Just in case you are wondering what to get for Xmas or my 23rd Bday!

Saying Hi to the Universe

I know I only blogged this morning and this post might seem like an attempt to convince you that this blog is going to be up for sometime. I assure you that I am not so dumb nor desperate as to utilise my energy into convincing my faceless readers. So what if this becomes another abandoned blog. I am sure I am just another entertainment read and with me gone, you would probably replace me with another. Now that blogging seems to be always in fashion.

The reason behind this post at the unearthly hour is a thought in me. In just the past two weeks, a realisation dawned upon me. I met new people and understood more about existing people in my life. It amazed me because nothin outta the ordinary actually happened. I mean in terms of my life; talking to a stranger and having a conversation with the loud toilet attendent at the mrt station is pretty much a norm. But as many would like to say ' The Universe Works in Mysterious Ways'.

I realised that sometimes when we have an idea about a person, and life makes it such that you have to challenge the idea, it can get quite scary. To actually have that realisation that, maybe the idea of the person is something that you hold on to and have grown used to. But now life gives you a different perspective, so do you take up the challenge of lookin at this person through a different pair of glasses? I did.

I was scared at first because shifting a belief that you have kept for years meant shifting other beliefs that have piled up upon it. But in all honesty, I think i was more reluctant because it meant that I had nothing to brood over. Alil sadness always encouraged creativity. It allows us to reside in a world of our own;A world so sad.It's like a drug. The sadness becomes a sort of a pill we take to keep us intuned with our emotions. I am guessing that it might be cultural. Being emo and dark and mysterious and broody, always seem to be in fashion. As much as it might make you cool like an anime character with blue eyes and knee high boots, It eats you up inside.

But i did. I looked at the person with a different pair of eyes and i realised that i allowed a bruised ego depress me rather than the idea i had of the situation. For many years, I thought I was being defeated but actually I realised that there was no fight to begin with.It was all in my head. It took Life's many weird ways to speak to me.

And even recently I met a woman of amazing aura. To think that she lived in the same block for a year and we've never met just amazes me. And then to find out that she conducts motivational classes for housewives and older folks blew me away. Cause although the participants might differ, the principles we work on is the same.If you haven't realise, I am studyin to be a sports psychologist or mental skills coach. And she gave me the most beautiful motivation to help me realise what I am doing and how i can help people with what I am doing.

Instead of looking for an avenue to brood and swim in a pool of pity,I realised I had the power to move people to be a better person. I had the ability to help.

And here i was worrying about things so minute and unnecessary like never falling in love with someone who loves me. It is something beyond my control. And all i have to do is allow the universe to take it's course and just be open to it.

It's like the Universe is telling me 'This is your purpose. I am sending you major hints and signals'. If I don't read them right, then I'd rather get hit by baseball bat.

It's wonderful, really. To be able to feel empowered all over again. To feel that you have the strength to do what you believe you were created to do.

I believe that that everything happens for a reason at the precise time it is supposed to happen.'So what if you're wrong?'some might ask. 'So what!' I say.Who judges wrong or right anyway? It's a matter of want to belief or not. And that belief itself can make immense difference.

We just got to open our minds and eyes to the environment around us and understand the signs that remind us of the beauty we are trully blessed with.

Today I see the beauty that I am and the beauty that surrounds me.

So if there's one thing you wish to take from reading this post, may it be this;

Allow yourself say Hi to a stranger cause you might discover yourself.
Never forget to say Hi to a friend, you might solve another mystery of life.

JU outz

Mind over Matter. Sex over Prata.

Isn't it just wonderful how life can turn 360deg just cause we wish it to do so?

You know how people like to throw the words 'it's all in the mind' at you, everytime you feel like giving up. And of cos, we feel like putting a fist to their mouths because I'd rather have some kind of physical or monetary help than just advise.

But take a step back from your misery and you'll realise that there's more truth in that phrase than you ever imagined. That doesn't mean I wouldn't want to sock the person who's advising just for the sadistic fun of it but nevertheless the phrase can change your life.

I am actually practising what I am about to preach to a couple of athletes. I believe that the best way to connect to these athletes, when sharing with them the mental skills I have acquired, is to go through the same ardent journey of learning to apply these skills. I hope to get some kind of rapport because I can truly say ' what i'm sharing with you is no bull'. But holy crap,it ain't easy..

Today I just completed a 4km run without stopping. Don't ask about the timing cause I didn't really care. All i know is that the sun was still up when i was done. Which is of course a VERY good thing. It was alil experiment and I was the lab rat. To test the extent of mental strength and to actually convince myself why it's important. You see, I can't sell if I am not convinced.

Well bringing us back to the first question, it actually changed my view on life. I was lazy and although appeared to be confident, didn't really make the mark. One might question whether one run can actually change the world or the person. It's a valid question but i feel that it takes one moment to make that one change to one's mindset that is so critical in deciding between winning and comin in second.So i say it can. It changed me. Believe me, I was smiling once I was done. Although my legs were crumbling and I felt the over whelming need to sleep for three days, I felt that I was capable of anything because 'it's all in my mind'.

Please take note that only last week, i wasn't even able to run a decent 2.4km without panting like scooby doo. I think it's amazing.

Well I am going to conduct more experiments on myself and if in the process I become rich or die trying, would somebody please make a movie outta my life. I'm sure you'll earn big bucks! Cause we're talking about me; i don't find trouble, trouble finds me. There you go, I already got the title for you.

Anyway Ad's in Aussie. Hopes she's doin well. Kinda weird that ma buddy's not around cause I see her nearly everyday. I hope she ain't driving someone else nuts by whining at them. Have fun addie!

Oooo.. and i got kinda amused when i heard this line from this song by Fergie -Clumsy
"You got me trippin, stumbling, flippin, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
You got me slippin, tumbling, sinking, crumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
So in love with you"

More like a funny thought went thru my head. If I were like Fergie and actually IN love, I'd probably die. Because even now when I am single and in love with noone, I'm trippin, stumblin, flipping, somersaulting, cartwheeling..just plain clumsy. Even yday when i went to meet faz and saiful, i tripped on a damn curb and my toenail is still aching till today. I think it's a chronic incurable disease; This clumsiness i have.

Talkin about yday meetin with faz and saiful, we went to simpang and they were playin Dvds on the TV. and Suddenly a scene of ultmate dodginess came on in the family-orientated eating place. Orlando Bloom was stark naked and sticking his woody into some chic who was exposin her tits. It just ain't right! There are kids around! I appreciate that these are the truths of life but spare a thought for the parents who were just after work with their young ones, man! I'm sure they're not gona be in the mood to explain about the birds and the bees over prata and teh.

It's funny when things like this happen in CENSOR HUB S'PORE! It's like there are secret communities out to make the Government look like fools. But then again, not like the Government are doing a bad job on their own. But hey, who am i to say but a lone girl in sunny singapore where everything always seems nice on the surface and all the craps pushed under the carpet.

That shall be left for another posting. I'll be going now..

Ju Out